Saturday, October 21, 2006

A Civil Religion?

We tend to think of the state as a secular entity, and of religion as being of a divine form of beliefs. However, Rousseau has proposed the idea of a civil religion, which consists of the full set of political doctrines, historical narratives, exemplary figures, celebratory occasions and memorial rituals through which the state impresses itself upon the minds of its members, specially its youngest or newest members.

In Singapore today, most people do not think of social hierarchy rigidly, but quite the opposite. Most Singaporeans celebrate the alleged absence of social hierarchy. This is part of what sociologist Robert Bellah calls our civil religion (this term was first coined by Rousseau), a set of quasi-religious beliefs and practices that bind the population and justifies our way of life.

When we think of Singapore as a meritocracy, where everyone can realize the ‘Singaporean Dream’ (regardless of race, language or religion), as a place in which individualism and free enterprise ensures maximal benefit for all, we are giving voice to a certain Singaporean civil religion.

Paradoxically, however, our civil religion may also help to divert our attention from the inequalities that persist in our society. A strong belief in equal opportunity for all, may for instance, lead people to overlook the reality that the lack of opportunity remains in our society.

DE-CONSTRUCTION OF NDP?

In this post, I would like to cursorily de-construct the National Day Parade, a good manifestation of what is meant by Rousseau when he suggests a civil religion.

COLLECTIVE EFFERVESCENCE?

Apart from drawing one of the largest television audiences, the NDP generates a sense of what Durkheim (a sociologist who focused on the functionalist approach to studying social phenomena) would have called “collective effervescence”. That is, the NDP excites us by making feel like we belong to a community that is much larger than our individual selves. For 2-3 hours each year, Singaporeans who participate in the celebration (even by just watching on TV) transcend their everyday lives and experience intense enjoyment by sharing the sentiment and values of a larger collectivity. In their fervor, they banish thoughts of their own mortality (and also perhaps get over their regret over not booking a holiday in time and going overseas). They gain a glimpse of a prosperous future for themselves and their descendants as they immerse in institutions that will outlast them and ‘national’ achievements (like Team Singapore’s scaling of Mount Everest) that people will remember for generations to come.

This “collective effervescence” is one of the rare occasions where people actually come together and actually feel Singaporean. It is also probably the closest thing you could ever witness to four million smiles, I guess. The only other occasions when I feel Singaporean is when I spot fellow Singaporeans by the NTUC plastic bags they carry while shopping in Johor or when you see familiar faces while relaxing at the not-so-integrated resorts at Genting.

TOTEMS?

We designate certain objects as symbolizing the sacred, objects which Durkheim called totems. While spiritual religions may have overt items like statues, crosses and chalices as totems, civil religions similarly have their totems, though they may not be that overt, which is also why I think it is more insidious.

Using the case study of NDP, we can see many totems of civil religion.





In this picture shown here, the obvious totems are the multitude of flags being used, not to mention the giant state flag used in the helicopter fly-past. But if you pay attention to the top left corner of the photo, you will notice an interesting phenomenon that that Parliament bloc is dressed in party colours of white, amidst a red fervent background of enthusiastic Singaporeans. Well we have all heard many unofficial explanations for this anomaly and I’m not about to dwell on them in this post.

I would like to offer something in line with this idea of a civil religion, where it almost seems as if the MPs have to deliberately dress differently from the rest of the madding to suggest notions of superiority. Indeed one can argue that it is just their party colours, but seriously, they look almost like the clergy, who have a religious duty to serve the masses. I used to be very puzzled why politics had anything to do with a national celebration, or nationalism. Now that I see Durkheim’s suggestion that such a religious belief in certain ideas functions like a social cement, yes it does seem that such a move helps to entrench certain ideas we have about certain groups and institutions. In short, we might be more inclined to accept our lot in life and the way things are, after we experience and complete such rituals.



By chance, I noticed this uncanny similarity also. I shall restrain myself from reading too much into it, but all I can say is that the Presidential drive-past it itself a totem, and is part of the many rigid rituals that characterizes the NDP. The rigid line-up of events, all synchronized to a perfect timing through countless rehearsals, combined with the many totems that are paraded throughout the NDP all work together to reinforce social solidarity. We suspend our everyday lives as we watch the whole ritual of NDP being enacted. The ritual heightens our experience of belonging to certain groups, which in turn panders to the theme for the year (a CMIO multi-racial family, forward-looking IT nation, etc), increases our respect for certain institutions, and strengthens our beliefs in certain ideas. These groups, institutions and ideas all transcend us, thus fulfilling the sacred nature of the event.

Indeed, there is much more about NDP to be de-constructed as a ritual. I myself, having served the last half of my NSF life working for NDP 2007 & struggling with its continued relevance to today’s society would definitely like to spend more time and effort researching into this area if my studies allow. I hope it has been intriguing to offer to conceptualize this idea of NDP as a civil religion.

Friday, September 15, 2006

"It s easy to imagine an infinite number of situations where the government might legitimately give out false information. It's an unfortunate reality that the issuance of incomplete information by government may sometimes be perceived as necessary to protect vital interests"

-Solicitor General Theodore Olson, whose wife Barbara was killed on September 11, 2001.

For those of you still very much convinced that the 9/11 attacks was definitely masterminded and executed by Al Qaeda, please spare a few minutes to look at this short documentary titled "Loose Change"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-guQaYgrWqI

Sunday, September 03, 2006

3 new diversions in life

1. My main duty and responsibility as an undergrad now, to mug. But well i guess it's in a way much better than during JC for at least 3/5th of what i'm doing now is what i really love to study. So yeah at least im not forced to take something im really allergic to like maths.

Really hope i can do decently well for my first term. Being VP of the 4.5 club is as good as being VP of fairyland. Yeah but i guess it's always good to have a high aspiration to look up to.

2. On a more serious note, yes i have been 'elected' as the Asst Honorary Gen-Sec of NUS Political Science Society. Though i got 'voted' in by default, nevertheless the fact remains that i will be busy with the tasks and responsibilities of being one of the 5 members of gthe managment cell.

To be honest i signed to run for appointment on a whim, but as i got into the groove of things, i realised this may really be the something new i want to try out at Uni. Yes it has been told to me how the internal politics ususally shreds up such small socieities easily, but nevertheless i hope i can hold my ground together with my counterpart. Let's just see how things go.

3. Together with a few of my friends and my former teacher who is still my teacher of Life, we have cobbled what is generally known as a political blog that is mainly grounded in issues concerning Singaporeans from all walks of life. Political or not, i guess we take a critical view of what happens to us as Singaporeans and freely express our views on this avenue.

If you ask on objectives, i guess our main desire is to promote a certain sense of political awareness and also to encourage our friends, family and acquaintances to get interested in at least politics at home, understanding the forces that shape our lives and the lives of our children in future.

SO yeah just jump in and visit the blog at www.meetthepeoplesession.blogspot.com
I've actually linked it on my blog also for easy access. Do feel free to be our worst critics and drop us comments on anything from warnings on OB markers (If they exist) to volunteering for website design! I really hope you have a peek before just branding it as 'just another political blog-wannabe'

Friday, August 25, 2006

After going through Arts Camp, Pre-camp, O-Week and Arts bashes I& II,

I guess i've had qte an eye feast..considering all the really beautiful and happening people

I see and meet during these FOPs.

Even among my OG and close friends...there are many cute girls and pretty ladies, so theres no escaping this daily drudgery of drugging my soul whenever i see them in sch.

Well, honest but narrow reflections aside, i guess what i want to sae is that im qte glad i made a realisation that i must look beyond superficial looks and feel-good stuff if im seriously looking for a soulmate.

To be brutally honest, yes i've succumbed just like any mortal to being attracted to people for their looks and stuff..but just glad that ikinda pulled myself back from the brink in time.

Guess im truly sober now and the drugging effects of superficiality have worn off on me.

What seems to attract me most about a lady now is her intellect,how we can connect at a deep level during conversations. we can talk bout anything under the sun, whether it be the current fashion trend for bags, local politics,macroeconomic policies, ethics or even Calvin and Hobbes my fav comic.

Such a lady is hard to come by i guess. Somehow, i've only been able to meet less than a handful ofladies like that in arts. Well some may argue that i've just been making the 'wrong' type of frenz..or that i havent been able to sieve through my prejudices to bring the friendship to a level where such intricacies are visible. Lets just say i've tried my best and i will treasure those few gems i've found in this vast ocean

Monday, August 21, 2006

betwixt Fate and haste
aboveth pain and vain
beneath'st name and gain
Life's most famous game

betwixt same and change
aboveth Chaste and chase
beneath'st sane and shame
Such ephemeral blame

amidst din and wind
aboveth dim and dream
beneath'st grin and gleam
Precious potter's kiln

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Stairway To Heaven-Led Zeppelin

There's a lady who's sure all that glitters is gold
And she's buying a stairway to heaven.
When she gets there she knows, if the stores are all closed
With a word she can get what she came for.
Ooh, ooh, and she's buying a stairway to heaven.

There's a sign on the wall but she wants to be sure
'Cause you know sometimes words have two meanings.
In a tree by the brook, there's a songbird who sings,
Sometimes all of our thoughts are misgiven.
Ooh, it makes me wonder,
Ooh, it makes me wonder.

There's a feeling I get when I look to the west,
And my spirit is crying for leaving.
In my thoughts I have seen rings of smoke through the trees,
And the voices of those who stand looking.
Ooh, it makes me wonder,
Ooh, it really makes me wonder.

And it's whispered that soon if we all call the tune
Then the piper will lead us to reason.
And a new day will dawn for those who stand long
And the forests will echo with laughter.

If there's a bustle in your hedgerow, don't be alarmed now,
It's just a spring clean for the May queen.
Yes, there are two paths you can go by, but in the long run
There's still time to change the road you're on.
And it makes me wonder.

Your head is humming and it won't go, in case you don't know,
The piper's calling you to join him,
Dear lady, can you hear the wind blow, and did you know
Your stairway lies on the whispering wind.

And as we wind on down the road
Our shadows taller than our soul.
There walks a lady we all know
Who shines white light and wants to show
How everything still turns to gold.
And if you listen very hard
The tune will come to you at last.
When all are one and one is all
To be a rock and not to roll.

And she's buying a stairway to heaven.

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Screen-based Existence

You wake up to ur hp alarm clock.

Morning news on the Telly.

Check Sms from previous nite.

Games & entertainment from ur PC

Working on lappy in school

Plugged into ur Ipod/MP3, wherever you go

Time to kill, movie to chill

Nowsadays, it does seem that almost every part of our life is bombarded by a digital screen. How we try to live out another existence through these digital screens. It's as if all these techno gizmos are an extension of our normal mortal selves.

Though it sometimes can be a little scary hairy mary to imagine how a puny digital screen attempts to encapsulate the whole of our being, our character. Guess thats how technology is sometimes perceived to be impersonal, especially when they are barrier-breaking and not yet widely accepted.

What an age it is to be living and breathing in now. When technology actually 'allows' one to be trapped in a digital existence. Perhaps it has been really successful at preventing us from playing a real game of soccer in the sun, with dirt and violence thrown in. Perhaps it has been really successful in preventing us from taking that dirty sweaty hike to experience a certain sunrise, the cool calm air, and above all the breathtaking scenery.

In a way i guess technology has allowed us to be complacent in our cement abodes, to try to take in experiences virtually. Indeed the leaps in technology has greatly improved the overall audio-visual experience we can get from digital outlets, but in how many instances can it beat the real thang?

I guess personally im the type who does not like to stay indoors for too long..i fact i react qte adversely to prolonged air-conditioning..i rather be out in the sun doing anything...whether its just for a simple dip to a leisurely hike to an excruciating game of soccer..

Really miss hiking and camping and outdoor cooking...haha

Saturday, July 08, 2006

I believe that

To Love is not to Posess

Sometimes u gotta set ur loved one and ur heart free to find true Love

Some say we should fight for our Love and for our Destiny

I guess i have done that before, with mixed results

At this point in Life, i've learned that sometimes

The greatest fight we have to put up with is

Ourself.

And that is one fight no one can help you with

A fight that you have to win.

Only after i won the greatest fight with myself did

I know how to win many other battles without a fight

Only then did i know how to set my heart free

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

Well if there's one thing i learned in life...

There ain't really such a thing as "The One"

I used to be qte a dreamer, qte a Romantic, qte absorbed in drama,
yes despite my usual cynic outlook

But nope that is not to say i'm not a believer in Fate
As much as i beleive in His great plan for me, i also feel that we are who we are
making the friends we make, indulging in encounters we have, all
also as a part of where the great ship of Fate steers us.

In this heady age where even
relationships become disposable to a certain extent
I think when two minds/hearts are able to come together and mingle
like two wisps of air forever chasing each other and wafting upwards
There is cause for applause and cheer

As knick-knacked as it may be, i guess we should forever treasure
this gaseous bind, whether it illuminates or it suffocates
i guess once again it's how both manouevre against the forces that be
that try to manipulate, castigate

Most imptly i guess both must make space for a foreign body
Only then can a venn union be made
For once we dwell in the well of love, we never do belong to ourselves
completely anymore.

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

The power of the Media. The power of suggestion

Every time i see the Adtrac clip which professes to showcase the "top 5 most-watched avertisements" in Singapore, i choke in disgust.

Take a minute to think about it:

1.DO you actually CHOOSE the advertisement you want to watch?
2.DO you actually switch channels primarily because you dunt like a certain ad, or conversely surf channels in search of your favourite ad?
3. DO you actually watch the ads anyway or do you instead take a pee break, snack break, pass the fruits, attempt to channel-surf without family protesting or check the latest 4D/TOTO results?

Rhetorical questions, i guess. Biased questioning, you may beckon.

But seriously, ithink it is more accurate to say that they are the 'top 5 advertisements that paid the top prices to be played right after most-watched TV PROGRAMMES'. And even that is only loosely based on the assumtion that viewers stay on the same channel even when their fav TV prog has lapsed into commercials.

The legitimacy of the Adtrac clip's claims are severely debatable, in my opinion. If you ask me, i see it as nothing more than a gimmick to give so-so advertisements more airtime and some sort of product differentiation. In short, it is nothing more than another thinly-disguised appendage of today's entertainment circle that has taken on such a commercial spirit.

Another trashy commercial apparatus that attempts to hoodwink those that are careless enough to slip into this make-belief and be further entrenched in this screen-based existence and experience.

Monday, May 08, 2006

AWARENESS

Before this year's elections, i could be considered politically apathetic

Or worse, a political ignoramus.

I used to justify that most pple of my generation was like that, nothing wrong. And politics didnt really seem to affect my life.

SO i breezed through 21 years of consciousness thinking i was well-learned and educated, ready to go to NUS and do just what any teen of my educational profile would do.

Indeed, i could be considered well-educated, just educated enough for the State to feel comfortable with i guess.

21 years of my life, my knowledge of the local political scene and local politics were gleaned from the State paper, radio, television.

But it only took 5 minutes at a rally to break all that fairytale and what's-done-is-always-best-for-you myth.

And from then on all my five senses were opened, i should say i was slowly waking up from a very heavy sedation.

Imagine waking up in the middle of an operation, finding that the anaesthesia has worn off just enough for you to have consciousness. You dunt remember agreeing to the op, but protest is useless since They will insist it's in your best long-term interests anyway. These individuals in white, all too busy with their professional tasks to notice your consciousness and increased heart activity. Incision is imminent, yet all your struggles are in vain as you find there is still enough to curb almost all muscular movement. You watch as they bleed you a little to prepare for the main beef of it. You're hooked up, you need constant blood transfusions. You summon all the might left inside you to force a tear, maybe that will attract attention.

Now elections are over. Status quo maintained with gains for the opposition almost all over the island. one in three singaporeans have voted for an alternative. hopes this forces a re-think of mentality and strategy. now they have started the post-election mop-up machinery.

I feel qte drained and filled with a sense of helplessness, hopelessness. what kind of society are we living in, here in sunny singapore? so many incidences that hark back to an Orwellian society..its scary hairy.

Sunday, April 09, 2006

Running

The month of March that's past went fast
And indeed it was quite a blast

It started off with my own 21st bdae
And ended off with a mass birthday celebration

Much is past and there have been qte a few developments in my life
New outlooks, renewed friendships, new opportunities, new dilemmas

Just went jogging with Edwin yesternite
Joined him on his rigorous exercise regime
A realisation that my sedentary lifestyle was poisoning me
Kickstarted this sudden urge to deny
myself from further procrastination, denial, inaction

I've always loved running..perhaps ever since i was drafted into my primary school track & field team
In my secondary school days, running was something i could no with so much ease
And running at Pandan reservoir gave me so much please

The fusion of personal fulfilment at being able to excel
And the sportsman's competitive drive
As i watch myself zooming past others
As i feel myself caressed by the deep blue sky and wafting clouds
as if the run was just between me and Mother Nature

Running with edwin was a whole new experience
I've never acually run with him before
And this time in an estate qte new yet familiar to me
Filled me with excitement

Though we didn't talk much
A certain chemistry and bonding existed
We just ran, through the neighbourhoods
Amidst the caressing night breeze
With passers-by and dogs looking on
We just kept running

Breathing's heavy, our chests thumping
The adrenaline kept us pounding

I started to realise an enchanting notion about pathways
Just as i was exploring new neighbourhoods on these paths
It mirrored my attempts at finding direction in life

Recently some new windows have opened in my life
Introducing me to avenues i never thought available for me
Some of them were always there for me, just that i never noticed
Never appreciated, never grabbed the opportunity

Indeed, some of these pathways of life are always there,
It is up to oneself to want to, and boldly choose to take them
To put trust in them to take me where i want
Just like how i put trust in Edwin to take me on a good run
Sometimes we need to trust in another to take us where we want

I ran considerably slower than usual yesterday
Besides the fact that i was qte out of shape,
I guess i was carying too much weight

More than the 1.5kg waterbag i was carrying,
I guess i had too much emotional baggage
I knew i was very distracted while running
Some dilemmas in my head, things that i thought would never bother me
And perhaps an opportunity at romance, my own fate to grab

I wasn't free-running like i usually did, without care and worries
Running somehow was a good way to sort out my thoughts
It emptied my soul of all other distractions of life
What remained were usually what were most important
What i should pay the most attention to and focus on
I jus kept running, not from my problems,
but to clear my soul in order to better get in touch with my inner self

After the run, though completely exhausted and broken,
I was much clearer about what i wanted
Sometimes it's not until the old mould is completely broken
Can we emerge anew and refreshed
Ready to take on any oncoming challenge

Next run's tomorrow.

Tuesday, February 28, 2006

As i approach my 21st Bdae, i'm not really sure what to feel
There's alot of hype bout the 21st bdae and i've experienced them 1st hand
After celebrating for a few friends who were early this year

Well i guess it's obvious by now that i'm somehow not that excited
About my very own 21st bade
Hmm..well for one i'm not the type that really emphasises alot
On my own bdae
I know it means alot to many of my friends so i do put in effort
To some of those closer to me, to make it really special for them

However when it comes to my own bdae, usually it just washes
Out like any other day
Sometimes my close friends remember and remind me of it before
I snap out of my mundane life
Most of the time i tell my frenz to keep it simple

Which is exactly what i prefer it to be
Which is what should happen for this one
Not that diff from any other bdae

If you ask me which of my bdaes i remember the best
Somehow i have vivid memories of one in sec3/sec4
Where my classmates gave me an adult magazine and
A shared card signed by most of the class
It's in my traeasure box of heartfelt gifts now
testimony to the little differences
i've made in some people's lives i guess

This 21st bade is kinda special also because it falls on
Ash Wednesday, a Catholic occassion which is
Actually kinda sorrowful and mournful
I could go on to explain how it heralds Lent but yeah
Basically it means that I need to go to Church at night
And that i should generally be in a reflective, meditative
Mood, no outward celebration i guess

Ok lah but i kinda find it significant cos
Ash Wednesday also reminds one of his mortality,
Of the Lord's great sacrifice of life for us,
Where "Dust to Dust, Ashes to Ashes"
Will be uttered in Church.

Somehow i can draw the link that it is an occassion similar to a bdae

It kinda reminds one that as we live in triumph of death
Every step we take is also a walk towards eventual death
Mortality

Both ocassions also encourage reflection on what one has
Done in life. Where i believe it matters more to count the
Differences you've made in people's lives than anything else
In life. Even ambition may be construed to be self-serving

As i walk along in life
I hope i will be constantly reminded of my mortality
Know what really matters in life
Live it to the fullest
And have close friends read my eulogy to all those whose grand lives
Have somehow been brushed by mine

Sunday, February 26, 2006

I've come to realise that sometimes
We dunt really know our frenz well

Off the cuff, we may be able to name
Up to ten good friends that we have
And talk to frequently and consult
Regarding life's never-ending queries

Yet when we size things down, perhaps
Only a few of them know intimately about
Your life, your previous love lives, your current
Your ambition, your dreams, your family background
Your innermost thoughts that few would appreciate
Or understand with respect to who you are

Perhaps only a few know why you say things
The way you say it
Why you regard people
the way you do
Why you regard money
the way you do
Why you regard love
the way you do
Why you regard family
the way you do
Why you regard religion
the way you do
Why you regard image
the way you do

Perhaps only a few will respect and understand
You for being who you are

The same goes for our friends i guess
When we claim them to be our true frenz, gd frenz, best frenz,
How much do we actually know about them?
Some of our friends just get relegated to being old friends, past acquaintances
Once our social circles diverge, we dunt really seem to know much about them anymore

The little info that we garner about old frenz,
Through proxy frenz, through blogs, through brief MSN chats, thru mass smses
Would not suffice to paint a picture of our frenz life adequately

Many things in life may hold us back from approaching
Such frenz for dinner or a catch-up session

I only hope that i do not lose sight of those friendships i
Truly treasure and truly want to retain and develop

As i approach my 21st birthdae, may i be able to
Consolidate some of my life's expereiences
And have in my heart a firm web of friendships
That i know will help me thru life
And make me a stronger person

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Recently i've been blogging alot

I'm not sure what it means,
Whether i'm too free, have more time to reflect, or probably plainly because i have too much angst now

One thing i know for sure is that my last leg of NSF life has really been screwed up

Nowadays in office, i truly feel that i'm wasting away my youth inside
That i'm not really contributing much
That i'm not being enriched by this NS experience

Maybe i shldnt expect too much
This is an Army life anyway, not school or work attachment
Oh yes its like an attachment in the sense that i pull long hours, am enslaved and underpaid,
And most of all i dutn really have much of a choice

Previously i would feel self-disppointment if i cldnt execute a task well
Nowadays i put in ZERO personal effort as a final scorn to something i believe in anymore
Also because i know personal effort isnt appreciated here
Only minor mistakes are magnified

I've tried to learn the way of Zen
But its either that im a bad student
Or that my job scope and exposure just doesnt allow that

Nevertheless, i choose to heck care
Call me names, Judge me like a Pharisee, say wateva u want
I've made my peace with Him

I believe i've done more than my fair share for this enterprise
And when personal queries out of concern are snubbed and rebuked
I know it's not worth it anymore
I have a dream –Sung to the tune of ABBA’s “I have a Dream”


I have a dream, to ORD
To help me cope, with NDP
If you see the wonder, of a fairytale
You can take the future, even if you fail
I believe in Civi
Something good in everything I see
I believe in Civi
When I know the time is right for me
I’ll ORD-I have a dream

I have a dream, a fantasy
To help me through, this NDP
And my destination, makes it worth the while
Pushing through the papers, still another pile
I believe in danger
Something screwed in everything I see
I’ll ORD-I have a dream
I’ll ORD-I have a dream

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

The shitty work, fluctuating workload and vacillating higher HQ

Its been more than 2 months since i returned from my Thailand trip last Dec-Jan
Got so caught up in shitty office work that i couldnt really find time to really reflect
Got arrowed to cover someone else's work
Though i love to work with my current immediate superior
Honestly the nature of the work sux and its a hectic life where weekends aren't spared
No wonder its a real family-breaker. Nope i balanced things off so my personal life's fine

The shitty work, fluctuating workload and vacillating higher HQ
Just makes every day in the office dreadful

Just makes me want to get out of the office everyday i get in
Just makes me want to keep pretending i'm talkign on the phone so nobody bugs me
Just makes me wanna look busy so i dunt have to multi-task and accomplish many many random jobs, which are a legacy of the many previous tasks i pioneered in other departments
The random jobs suck as they drag me through my workday, just like a pesky attachment to a previous relatsp

Sometimes i just dunt want to be so good at multi-tasking
Sometimes i just dunt want to pick up 90% of the phone calls
Sometimes i just dunt want to clear up others' mess
Sometimes i just dunt want to be so well versed in Army staff SOP
Sometimes i just dunt want to exploit my friendships to accomplish work objectives
Sometimes i just dunt want to explain my differences from my peers

Sometimes i wanna be able to respect some of my Officers
Sometimes i wanna stop throwing smokescreens and lying my way through
Sometimes i wanna stop speaking up for my superiors
Sometimes i wanna shut some colleagues up
Sometimes i wanna tell my superior to wake up his idea
Sometimes i wanna stop subsidising my superiors' monetary excesses
Soemtimes i wanna tell my superior to stop being a leach
Sometimes i wanna tell my superior to stop being a bitch
Sometimes i wanna internal meeting to start on time
Sometimes i wanna tell my superior to stop wasting my youth
Sometimes i wanna tell my superior to stop procrastinating
Sometimes i wanna tell my superior to stop blaspheming
Sometimes i just wanna be a normal soldier
Sometimes i just wanna be left alone, at peace
Such egotistic, self-righteous, self-made tyrants

One thing i can't stand in the Army
Is when your superiors take you for granted

Short of a word of thanks
Or appreciation for past efforts

They always seem to fall victim to being
Blind to all personal efforts
But conscious of every little mistake you make

Such are some superiors in the Army
Base creatures they are
Thinking they actually have the
Right to take people for granted
Just because of the insignia on their shoulders or sleeves

Such egotistic, self-righteous, self-made tyrants
Endorsed by the Coat Of Arms

Its a crying shame i say
Nobody in the world is justified in taking
Another fellow human for granted I say

I await this grand hubris to unfold
These self-contained Dreamers to crumble
When without aides they shall fumble
All pretence at greatness shall fall down a tumble

For all who exalt themselves shall be humbled
And all who humble themselves shall be exalted

Imperfection may be accepted by the Lord Almighty
But for those who constantly sin against Humanity
I think they need to reflect aplenty

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Perhaps it's about time things took a shift

I realise that at this point in time i am stepping out of alot of things in life
The visible ones may be that of an Army life, which is in itself a varied lifestyle

One may even see it as a sheltered form of life
Where you are removed from the pressure:

To find work, to earn your keep
To study, to fulfil your priority obligation as a student
To continue to be creative; cos you can just blame the routines of an Army life
To continue to speak well; cos you ain't never seen a sergeant who does,
or you just can't help cussing
To continue to write well; cos you fill in more forms then write constructively inside
To continue to air your views, debate; cos freedom of speech isn't really present
To be courteous; cos it's a dog-eat-dog world inside

So as i step out of this lifestlye, there are many adjustments i would have to make

An Army life, as bad as it might seem from your peers' accounts or personal experience,
Can in many ways actually be a sheltered way of life
Just think of the many excuses you've found urself using when
Friends remark that you've changed

An Army life has also allowed me to be almost totally financially dependent from my parents
That is something i still hold proud for myself
But perhaps that is just Leson 1.1 in my long journey toward personal/family financing
I'm not sure how it's gonna work out after i draw my last Army allowance,
But i do know that i can start earning my keep
And be very proud of it

As for the less visible and tangible things that i am stepping out of
I leave that to my close friends and future confidante(s) to find out

In a way, this is Liberation that many, including me
Cry out randomly every dreadful day at work
In a way this Liberation signals separation as history has always demonstrated

I can choose to Liberate myself and decry this former lifestyle as a total waste of time and taxpayer's money
But i feel that this NS experience has indeed done me alot of good personally

I dunt know when i will have the time and effort to pen down parts of my NS experience,
But i must say i have had quite a varied and rewarding experience so far
Experiences that will take me far in life i know

Thursday, February 09, 2006

"Many little things to do"

Seems like a common comment you might hear from friends
yet sometimes we realise thats whats happening to our lives
At the end of the Day, Week, Month

Sometimes i wonder if it's qte meaningless if we live life chasing all the loose ends
But neglect the really impt things like friends, love, dreams and ambitions

Oftentimes, i find myself doing things for the sake of doing it
A routine is still worthy of execution, as long as you see the logic and rationale behind it,
Like peeing or eating.....

But sometimes work, in all forms of it, is so routine and meaningless
That you just dunt put heart into it
You just do it, subconsciously, like breathing

Ok this may begin to sound like an amatuer try at existentialism
Im just trying to take a few steps back in life
To see whats really worth doing, stopping
Or putting my heart and soul in

Perhaps it is just as well
Much have i experienced in the past 3 months
But honestly i havent had the time to relax and reflect
Internalise some lessons, forge some resolve

Im sure that introspective approach would be much more useful
Than New year's resolutions made on the spur

I pray to God for strength that i may live each day anew
And that i may be given strength and vision
To differentiate the really impt things in life from pesky trivial stuff
That keeps trying to block/slow my way
And for the courage to focus effort on the more impt things
Despite censure, 'worldly' advice

For things in my power to change
I will try my best to carve things out to the best i deem fit
As for the rest beyond me
God Will make a Way...